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How to Help your Child Overcome Shyness

How to Help your Child Overcome Shyness

Every child is unique. From the way they cope with situations to the way they learn, each child will have a different timeline and a varied personality. Often you come across a child who is animated and lively at home but becomes a completely different person (and shyness overcomes) outdoors, especially among large groups and strangers.

There will be times when you will wonder if there is something wrong with your child but relax! There are children who are introvert by nature.
They only feel comfortable in familiar surroundings and among familiar people. While this might be causing you sleepless nights, it’s not an insurmountable problem.

What is essential is to identify the cause and deal with it in a timely manner so that your child is not overcome by shyness in every new situation.

Recognize the Signs

Start by spotting the signs of a shy child. Is your child a bundle of energy at home but withdraws into herself when outside? Is she a chatterbox with familiar people but refuses to speak in front of strangers? Does she understand concepts but can not articulate them in school? If the answer to these questions is Yes then you have a shy child on your hands.


Children are remarkably intelligent creatures. And they love being spoken to and explained things. Sit your child down and ask her why she refuses to speak in public.

If she says she’s scared, dispel her fears by pointing out how you and other family members also speak to people without fear. Help her understand that her teachers are her friends and if they address her in class, it’s good to answer. If she has friends, point out how they talk to other people (be careful not to compare!)

Don’t Criticize

There is nothing worse for a child than to get the feeling that her parents are disappointed in her. While it’s okay to explain, don’t fall into the trap of criticizing her or making her feel that you are angry with her because she’s shy. This will only make her withdraw more into herself and worsen the situation.


Children love being rewarded so work out a system by which your child knows that if she does a task well she will get a reward. For example, if you are going for a new sports or art class, tell your child that if she doesn’t cry and performs well in the class, you will give her a treat. This will provide her with an incentive to try and overcome her shyness.

Don’t Give Up

It can be incredibly frustrating to deal with a shy child but you need to be patient and keep working on her without losing your cool. It might take several months for the results to show up but believe me; your child will shed her shyness and come into her own unique personality.